a new week

A new week unfolds in front of us like the blank page of a journal. What will be written on it?

I’m not sure. And I imagine you aren’t either. None of us can know what tomorrow holds. But there are some words that we can always count on to be there every day of our lives.

Love – You are loved. Just as you are. More than you know. Nothing that happens this week can change that reality. You’re not going to be alone this week. Not for one day. Not for one moment. Not for even one second.

Grace – You are accepted. Your sins have been forgiven and you are free. Your mistakes and failures can’t separate you from God anymore. You can take risks, make bold decisions, embrace new opportunities because you can’t lose what matters most.

Hope – You have a future that’s good. This week is part of a larger plan, a greater purpose. Even when you don’t understand what he’s doing, God is working on your behalf. He sees the bigger picture of your life and he’s committed to making it beautiful.

Let’s make the most of this week, my friend.

It’s another page of our story.

And we can trust the One holding the pen.

you

Dear You,

It’s so easy to look at the woman across the room, across the sanctuary, across the world wide web and think: “I should be more like her.” We compare clothes, talents, how many friends we have on Facebook. We crave validation and surely if we can be like the people we admire then we will have it.

Yet God doesn’t compare you to anyone else. Not that friend whose house looks like a spread in a magazine. Not the woman in your church who knows how to make everyone laugh at just the right moment. Not even the leader who seems to have a direct line to Jesus while you feel like you’re dialing the wrong number half the time. Not to any of those—or any other woman who has ever been or ever will be. When you gave your life to Jesus you became a “new creation.” Listen closely: it doesn’t say “a new human being.” A new creation.

In other words, God made you into something the world has never seen before and never will again.  Women struggle so much with comparison.

You are a one-of-a-kind masterpiece, a custom design, a work of art.

And when there is only one of something, it’s impossible to compare it.

That means since there’s only one of you, you can’t be compared either. When God looks at you, he sees his handiwork and the sacrifice of Christ on the cross. That’s it. The only standard he ever asked you to meet is the one Jesus met in your place. So you are free from being compared.

What do you do instead? Be the you he has created, called, and redeemed you to be. Develop your strengths. Discover your gifts. Do whatever you can to serve those around you with what you have. Display his glory by living fully alive, by beautifully reflecting the part of his image he has crafted into you.

Give yourself permission to stop comparing. And instead start celebrating who you are and the God who made you that way. Then let your heart feel his response…

His incomparable joy.

Someone Who Loves You

{Genesis 1:31, 1 Corinthians 12:12-27, Philippians 2:1-11}

comfort

No matter what happens today…

God is the same as yesterday,

same as tomorrow.

that is such a comforting thought for me.!!

what really matters

The sink overflows with dishes. Pans and bowls lay scattered across the kitchen. The counters are covered with smudges of who-knows-what. Years ago, this would have sent me into an immediate cleaning frenzy. But tonight I turn off the light and let it go. I step into the warm summer night for a walk with my husband. I read a book on the couch for a few moments. I talk to someone I love on the phone.

When I come back the next morning, the mess is still there. But those moments that really mattered would have been gone forever.

And it turns out my worst fears weren’t realized: the health department failed to show up, a reporter neglected to take photos through my windows, and no one came for my children.  

As I stared at my slightly scandalous kitchen and thought about this I noticed a saying on a sign in the house, “Live fully. Love deeply. Laugh loudly.” And I nodded in agreement at those words.

I’m a person who wants order. I need simplicity and organization. I believe in keeping the dust bunnies somewhat at bay. But there are times when it matters more to make dinner for your friend who just had a baby and leave the dishes on the counter, actually answer the phone, and watch the fireflies come out with someone you love.

Because the dishes will stay but life goes by and you can never get a single day back.

So every once in awhile, just turn off the light and ignore what needs to be done. And when you come back to it, let it remind you of what’s most important in your life.

Because sometimes a mess just means we’re busy with what really matters.

Difference in forgiving and trusting

I read this blog today...why is it so hard to forgive and trust again is a question I ask myself often.  

Most of us want to forgive. We don’t want to hold a grudge. We don’t want to be bitter. We don’t want our lives to be consumed with resentment.
But more than wanting to forgive, we don’t want to be hurt again.

There is this natural belief that if we forgive, then we are not only saying what that person did was okay, we are being vulnerable enough to allow them to hurt us again.

Resentment becomes our only defense mechanism to protect our heart. I think many of us live with resentment and bitterness not because we want to, but because we’ve confused forgiveness with trust.

Forgiveness, according to Scripture should be offered unconditionally. In fact, if there are conditions, then it isn’t forgiveness. But trust has to be earned.

If you have been hurt; betrayed; abused; cheated on; lied to then it is easy to confuse these two things.
In fact, so many people that you talk to often feel like they haven’t fully forgiven because their trust hasn’t been restored.

Forgiveness is a process, but trust is a prized possession. Once your trust has been broken, it becomes even more valuable.

As someone who has broken ultimate trust in my marriage can I encourage you? Offer forgiveness freely; offer trust slowly.

Healing doesn’t come all at once. When you’ve been hurt, lied to or betrayed your heart is in a vulnerable state.

What you want most is what you used to have.

What you long for is life before the porn; before the sexting; before the lie; before the cheating; before the Facebook relationship.
What you are tempted to do is to equate forgiveness with trust…and when you do that you short-circuit your healing and the one whose broken your trust’s restoration.

If you desire the relationship to be restored, begin to communicate things that will build your trust. Give the person who’s hurt you an opportunity to earn your trust. Don’t hold them hostage to your suspicions…communicate with them what you desire from them to earn trust. What you shouldn’t be is fearful or paranoid…rather wise and discerning.

I
f you have broken trust in a relationship, it is so easy for you as well to confuse forgiveness with trust. Your feeling is “If you have really forgiven me, then we wouldn’t be having these conversations.” Ask yourself this question, “Has my spouse (friend, sister, daughter) not forgiven me, or do they not trust me?” When you confuse forgiveness with trust you begin to think that you can never do enough to be forgiven.

My guess is that it is much easier for the person you’ve hurt to forgive you than it is to trust you. They love you and want to forgive you, they are just fearful of being hurt again. Humility on your part will go a long way. Pay the price. Seek to do the little things that will earn trust.

The currency of any relationship is trust. Maybe today your relationship seems bankrupt because you’ve confused trust with forgiveness.

As we forgive, we free ourselves from bitterness. As we trust, we experience the process of restoration.